just another plain post.

I thought I could resist you

I thought that I was strong

Somehow you were different from what I've known

I didn't see you coming

You took me by surprise

and You stole my heart before I could say no

i cant take this anymore.

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh sakit sakit! my head is spinning , gosh the headache is so painful!

i feel like puking anytime soon, i can't even think straight rite now. it feels like there is dis sumthing big and heavy on top of my head. it feels like my head just been punched or knocked with sumthing hard.

i need a "painkiller" who can stop this suffering. plz plz i need a good piece of mind to study for my 3 upcomings tests, but dis headache is so disturbing and annoying.

anyone plz give a sympathy to me, i need it. anyone who cares, no one? =(

you took me by suprise.

when u think back with more deeply and with a heart of concerned, sometimes the person who are NOT close to you are actually the one who are going to help when u are having ups and down of life. i'm saying this thing not because it has something to do with my life, well sort of sket sket je.

i don't know la maybe im the one who hoping or asking too much from people, i rely on people, I burden some people sometimes. but mistakes had teach me a lot. dulu dulu kala, i was very dependant on people.i relied on people too much till i had annoyed some people. i was snobbish n childish, thank god i learnt from the mistake and i learn to be more indepedant.
At one point, i had FINALLY realized i'm the "ngada childish" type of person when i was in soaring the eagle program. thank you STE! all of sudden after getting through all da module, i was like "shitttt! gler ella ni x berdikari, relying on people even in small matters".
mayb because i was the youngest one in the family consequently i was always askin help from my brothers and sister since i was small. pretyy much nothing i had done by myself kot.

but back to the main point, what i try to deliver here is sometimes people u close to are not very helpful compare to people who has nothing to do with u are actually very much helpful and giving an effort to help. sigh. well certain people not all.
so, i am try my best not be on dat particular group coz i know i might be dat person if i dun watch myself and not be aware of it. Note to self, it is not about being-selfish bt it is about to prove yourself u can do it.

okie cut out all this emo-emo stuff, u know it is not my thing? all this kinda heart-session stuff which i'm so not good at it, mmg x qualify langsung jadi peer helper, fail!

back to the daily routines, i'm so stressed up due to shit of worklads! it takes any seconds left to make me explode, kebabbabooommm. haha xnak la nanti meletup who is goin to pick up da pieces? merepek merepek.
seriously my level of stress is beyond the point already. i waat to burst into tears to let it all out eveything inside but i can't drop even a tears la, airmata xmo kluar coz dah lama x nanges kannn.
kerja oh kerja kenapa bertimbunn?

• hse assignment


• oop test 2(tues)


• database test 2(wed)


• finance test 2(thurs)


• submit database portfolio and group project


• finance presentation


• oop coding presentation

now i know how difficult life can be and now i know why people jump-off from the 21st floor building. hahaha well my life is sort-of dat hard okieee but i'm not goin to jumpe off. Tu keje org xde otak je. paling cikai if stress pun i will shout at my pillow untill i can't breathe nemore since i stuck my face at the pillow. mereng marang skapel tol.

did u know if i am entering my stress-zone due to of workloads, i started to miss the person i love. i need someone to talk to when im all stress-up. that is the reason i'm out of credit in this few days coz i've been calling my mom, emma, da whole family, soon to call fieza n illi-my laughing box. i even miss someone who i can't call,who i can't meet, a person who is gone. the one who never fails to inspire me, u r always in my heart no matter im in stress im happy or im sad. still, you are remembered.

i'm doing this blog in the middle of studying object-oriented programming, now u know why i write this very-long boring post blog? blame programming, haihh ella mmg xde jodoh la ngan programming. susah tol nak ngorat programming, xdpt xdpt! last night, apek n i were looking at the star and we were trying our best to count the stars at the sky which was seem endlessly. i was hoping a shooting star to make a wish. if there is one shooting star, apek asked "what is ur wish?"

straightaway i answered without hesitation " i want to get a deanlist!". tgk berkobar kobar tau jawab, puh-lease puh-lease i need one deanlist to make my self and my parents proud. atleast they feel worth it spent ringit-ringit malaysia to her lovely spoilt-brat daughter. well, atleast i dun ask for ferrari. hehe sorry b.

"catch a falling star n put in ur pocket never let it fade way"

hehe feel like singing dat song. comelllllll.

(due to my status at ym, it stated "stress up bcoz of workloads". in da middle of writing this post. then ade la sorg budak comel nie tego kt ym.

BUZZ!!!

adeera lightofnur: jangan stress Ella

adeera lightofnur: Happy Happy ada pen warna warna okaay !

adeera lightofnur: BTW Adeera tgk dkt mph smlm, harga kita nyer pen tu 42 hengget

adeera lightofnur: we're lucky to dapat yg murah !

zuhaila elma: hehe thanks adeera!

zuhaila elma: naseb baik ada pen warna2 to cheer me up

zuhaila elma: nak post kan blog la!

to adeera and her roomate-suhaili,

tima kaceh 4 accompany me all da way to v5 at night just to buy pen warna-warni. we singgah v4 and in the end, beli kat v3 sudeyh. cun cun cun we were so happy to find out the pen warna-warni came out newly freshed from the box. jerit kegembiraan haha! even abg jaga kedai tu pelik. he asked "urgent ke?". "xla semangat untuk buat notes je".

thanks darlings 4 giving me the determination to study n write notes!

from ur pen warna-warni-partner,

ella.

my very precious pen warna-warni! =)

murah murah belila at v3!

jika anda gembira, tepuk tangan!

I miss my lil persie pillow( it is a jersey pillow of my fav football player, van persie). I miss hugging and cuddling it whenever I sat on the backseat of my kuda merah car when someone else was driving the car. I miss my lil persie pillow since of course the only arsenal jersey I have, which apparently I cannot wear it haha. it is just a pillow la kan? I miss it badly.
However, it is good to know that someone is taking good care of my lil persie pillow. I bet lil persie has a brand new smell, dah jd bau bantal busuk org tuu. To who you know who you are, send my best hugs n kisses to lil persie n the one who keep it too.

Yes yes yes yes esok balik, it’s time to go homeee, FINALLY!
Bye bye utp (which only for three days, too bad cuti sembreak tros xleh ke?).
So,

• hugging mummy
• gelak kuat mcm laki ngan emma(mmg laki pun haha!)
• dgr aman kutuk psl ella main keyboard
• late movie kat "ou cheras"= jusco cheras
• tgk af with fam di malam sabtu
• breakfast kedai red kebaya(jumpe mrs dulang)
• shopping with my sis, emma then gelak gelak kutuk blakang mamy
• pavvy, mid, ou, klcc sumer la mall yg ade kt kl!
• carls jr, babeyhh!
• lepaking mamak till "curfew" with fieza n illi
• makan sedapppppp (tomyam mummy)
• tido air-cond on my own bed
• erina, erina, erina my baby budak kecik!
• jumpe bibik eton, nasik lemak tau?

all of these, here I comeeeeeeeeee.

( (senyum sorg sorg sbb dok fikir esok nak balik kl haha!)

three wonderful weeks at tronoh.

Waaaaaaa rindu rindu, homesick baby. I’m so missing my bed, mom’s cooking, my homies, big screen tv and of course the ones who complete me, my family. i want my mumyyyyyyyyyy! Not to say my life sucks at utp, so far I had one of the happiest moments here but still nothing can compare than the home sweet home. Some people are askin me what is so great goin back to home so often like you? What did u do back there? Then, it started makes me wonderin. Aah kan if I was at home, there were pretty much nothing I did. Dok melepak depan tv, melayan drama melayu, goin out to mall n mamaks with friends, shopping with my sister , makan makan n dup dap dup dap dah balik utp again. Heyyyyyyyyyyy pretty much nothing u said? That what we called quality time with the person u loved the most. Eventhough there are only 3 weeks I stayed at utp without goin back, dah kecoh satu utp kot I’ve successfully stayed at utp-wuhhuuuu!


To make thing more heat up, I went back early on the mid-sem break. Funny is it? Since I was always the last one to arrive at utp for mid-sem break, but uh uh kali ini ada kemajuan sket. Mostly, if the class starts on Monday morning. I arrived at utp late night on Sunday or in the Monday’s morning. Weeeeee cherish every single minute we had at home. But this time around, I had to go back early for the euphonious practice session since I was in the band kan?! Hahahahahahaha.
Some of my friend(fieza) made fun of it. ala gelak gelak, tahu la jeles kannn. teehe.

Yes. I am in the band. Stereopop, the bandname it is. Cool kan? I am the keyboardist. The newest member in the band and and and the cutest one, haha that one I made it up. It was my first time jamming! And it was so awesome and I pretty much like it. suke la jamming ngan korg pastu xde keje pegi menjelajah kg bali pukol 2 pagi! Seram wooooo, kat dh cuak ella pun! Haha thanks u guys for a great a time, thanks 4 memories dudeeeees and a girl. Eventhough we cannot make it to final, but we did our best! At least this time euphonious korg ada keyboardist baru kan? Haha. Xpe next musicfest I’ll be watching n supporting sterepop since I’ll not be in it.

thank youu again and i will be missing u guys.

kat=vocalist, zakwan=vocalist, apek=lead guitarist, akkay=rhythm guitarist, spawn=bass guitarist, reza=drummer and me=keyboardist.

Eventhough our band Stereopop cannot make it to the final, congrats for the other bands too! I like raptors n retrodelic, they deserved to be in the final but too bad no luck this eupho kot?

The lead guitarist in the raptors is awesome good too, =) . I sayang you b! =)
I had no pass to make it on stage on the euphonious final, but still I am the euphonious 09 committee this time around. I am in the welfare department, ceh welfare tuuuuuuuu.
So, I have a backstage pass, well pretty much la ella bkn nyer cnp department pun, they are the one who in charged. At least I had a chance to meet and snapped pic with sam bunkface! Waitt I was on stage! Ala not like I was the performer pun, just helping out for the prizing ceremony (which was messed up!). As far as I’m concerned, my fav band were not there on stage so I was just there watching but not supporting, I do want to vote but since I’m the committee I did not have the ticket to vote, so vote dlm hati jela. I do like morven, they did their best. Vote green!
Btw, congrats crash n burn for winning euphonious 09!

sam bunkface! u guys did an awesome performance!





welfare department of euphonious comitee 2009. keje dah settle beb!

my fav girlfriends, n mae too.